


Easy A

by Jacob_The_Random_Writer



Category: South Park
Genre: Future Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 10:48:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20795411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jacob_The_Random_Writer/pseuds/Jacob_The_Random_Writer
Summary: Kyle finds himself lost in the suffocating world of rumors reliving the sappy romantic comedy Easy A in his own life.





	Easy A

Kyle threw back his fifth shot of watermelon vodka and everyone cheered “Alright, all tied up”he smirked at his best friend. 

“I’m gonna win this Kyle”Stan said chuckling the two were in a heated battle of beer pong but, to make things more interesting, they put vodka in their cups. Stan faked a couple of throws then finally tossed his ball landing it in Kyle’s last cup. 

The crowd around them cheered “Wait wait. Rebound”Kyle said quickly. If he could get this shot they would go into sudden death. He threw his ping pong ball the white ball flying through the air and missing Stan’s cup by inches. The crowd went wild for Stan’s victory and Kyle tossed back his last shot. “Good game”Kyle said stumbling over to Stan “Yeah but you look trashed”Stan said grabbing his friend by the shoulders. Kyle scoffed “I’m fine”he waved it off Stan shrugged “Just let me know if you want a ride home”. Kyle wandered off after that leaving Stan with his cheering group. The seventeen year old stumbled through the crowd unaware of his surroundings. 

Kyle roughly bumped into someone and almost went down but the person grabbed him before he fell. “Man, do you need help”they asked, it was some guy on the basketball team “No I’m fine”Kyle mumbled. “I’m gonna get you up to a room”the guy said pulling Kyle along. When the door of the bedroom shut Kyle could finally hear himself think, not that he was aware of his thoughts either way. “Uh thanks for”Kyle paused “Bringing me up here”he looked around slowly. The room it was dimly lit with a red light and forgotten clothes laid strew covering the floor. 

“No problem”the random kid said while locking the door “Do I- Do I know you”Kyle asked confused. “I’m in your English class”the kid said surprised “I sit behind Stan”he explained. Kyle couldn’t recall anyone by that description but he often got distracted by Stan. The kid walked slowly up to Kyle “I’ve had my eye on you since the beginning of the year”he smirked but Kyle was confused. He had come out to his family and friends a year ago but never to the school he couldn’t imagine the tole it would take on him. He was already small so he couldn’t handle the beatings if the school knew he was gay. 

“I’m not”Kyle said backing away “Come on I’ve seen the way you look at Stan”the kid said narrowing his eyes “But I’m better than him. I actually want to be with you”he pressed a hand to his chest. 

“Get back”Kyle said quickly “Can’t you just listen”the guy said desperately “No I mean get back”Kyle bent over and threw up an intense amount of Taco Bell and watermelon vodka. When he finished he stumbled back and dropped onto the bed. The other guy in the room was gagging and quickly turned away, but Kyle couldn’t stay conscious long enough to apologize. 

Kyle’s eyes shot open the next morning and he coughed the terrible taste of throw up still lingered in his mouth. He was glad he didn’t know the person who’s house it was because he left without apologizing to them as well. Kyle took the entire weekend to recuperate after that party but he couldn’t remember what happened after his fourth shot at the beer pong table. On Monday Kyle walked into school ready for a new week as he walked through the hall his smile dropped. People watched him as he walked, some whispered, some snickered, one guy even bumped into him on purpose. 

“Kyle”someone shouted and Kyle looked over Kenny was pressing himself against Kyle’s locker. 

“Hey, do you know what’s going on”Kyle asked as he walked up Kenny had a strange look in his eyes. 

“Were you planning on telling us”he asked in a hushed voice “What the hell are you talking about”Kyle asked obviously confused. 

“Kyle!”Stan yelled running up Kyle looked over “Oh god are you weird too”Kyle asked. “At the party- I should have stayed with you. I’m sorry”Stan pursed his lips.

“I have no idea what you guys are talking about”Kyle said shrugging. 

“You don’t have to hide from us Kyle, we know”Kenny raised his eyebrows and looked at Kyle sternly. 

“Know what!”Kyle shouted his friend’s faces dropped “You and Jeffery had sex at the party on Friday”Stan said shocked. Kyle’s eyes went wide “What? No we didn’t”the redhead’s voice was high and scared “Uh yeah. He told everyone”Kenny said quietly. Kyle shook his head “No we didn’t. Guys I promise I didn’t do it with that guy”he looked to both of them and Stan nodded along. “I would have known if I did. Listen I bumped into him and he took me to a room but then he started saying something. I don’t really remember but I know for a fact that we did not do it”Kyle held his hand out flat for emphasis. 

“Oh ok I believe you”Kenny winked Kyle punched him in the arm “Fuck off. I didn’t have sex with him”Kenny whimper out a soft “Ok”. Kyle sighed deeply “What exactly did you guys hear”he asked almost not wanting to hear the answer. 

“Well I heard that you and Jeff went into the room and people heard you two doing it”Stan said averting his eyes. “I heard that you two went up to the room and you begged him to fuck you and he didn’t want to but you were so desperate. And he thought of you like a girl and totally rocked your world. Then uh someone walked in and saw you two”Kenny recounted looking up into the sky then finally looking down at the end. Kyle’s eye twitched “I’m gonna fucking kill him”the bell interrupted the three’s gossip session and Kyle groaned. “Ok at lunch I am going to find that motherfucker and rip his eyes out”Kyle punched his hand. 

“Oh before you go, you should see this”Kenny pulled away from Kyle’s locker to show that someone had written Fag in bold black letters “Fuck”Kyle yelled. Due to the lack of time Kyle only crossed out the hateful word many times in a black marker leaving it for clean up later. In every class, every passing period, every second of that day Kyle felt eyes on him and whispers about him. The weight of everyone’s judgment loomed heavily over Kyle. Everyone in the school knew about his fake time with Jeff and he waited angrily for lunch to come. 

“Where is Jeff”Kyle asked slamming his tray down on the lunch table Stan jumped “I don’t know. Outside by the basketball hoops probably”. Kyle didn’t wait for his friends to accompany him he alone stomped over to the basketball hoops. Just as Stan said the jerk was standing with his friends “You fucking idiotic bastard”Kyle shouted the three guys looked over two of them started chuckling while the other, Jeff, looked nervous. “You’re a liar and a fucking sicko”Kyle said shoving Jeff backward. 

“Hey”one fo Jeff’s friends started “Wait guys. Give us a second”he put on a smirking face for his friends. Jeff grabbed Kyle and drug him over to a quieter spot “Let me go. Don’t fucking touch me”Kyle yanked his arm away. “Listen I’m really sorry”Jeff said “Too fucking late”Kyle quickly punched the taller teen in the stomach he crumbled. 

“Ok I deserved that but hear me out”Jeff said through gritted teeth. “I didn’t know what to do. I left the room after you passed out and someone asked me what we were doing together”he let out a pained breath then stood. “I’m not strong enough to come out to anyone yet”he glanced around obviously scared. “They started judging me so I had to make something up”he pressed his teeth. “You’re a fucking coward plus a dumbass. You told people you slept with a guy so they wouldn’t accuse you of being gay”Kyle rolled his eyes “Idiot”. 

Jeff nodded “At first people laughed but that’s why I told them that you wanted it and that”he paused “I though of you as a girl”. Kyle punched him again in the stomach “I’m sorry again”he squeaked out “Save it you fuck, cause you’re gonna fix this. You’re gonna tell everyone that we didn’t do anything”. Jeff sprung back up “No I can’t. You know how popular I am now. I have three dates lined up just for today alone”. Kyle grabbed Jeff’s collar yanking him to his level in a deep voice and gritted teeth he uttered a few terrifying threatening words. Jeff swallowed and stood straight “I-I’m sorry Kyle I can’t tell anyone the truth”just as he finished his sentence his friends rounded the corner. 

“Uh no way homo. Get away from me”Jeff said in a fake deeper voice his friend laughed “Is this fag asking for more”one said and Jeff nodded “Fuck off gaylord”the second pushed Kyle and he hit the wall. “Come on. Let’s get away from him”Jeff motioned with his head and they left Kyle clenched his fists now seething with anger. Kyle held his pencil so tightly it almost snapped under the pressure while he sat in his English class. Jeff hadn’t shown up for that class and Kyle knew it was because he was guilty. Stan tapped his friend on the shoulder and Kyle whipped around “What”he asked rudely Stan grimaced. 

“Look I just wanted to ask you- uh how you’re feeling”he said nervously, it seemed like he wanted to ask something different but kept it to himself. “I’m fine”Kyle said turning away “But you’re not”Stan countered “Stan would you”Kyle let out a sigh he didn’t want to disrupt the class “Drop it”he said his voice finally returning to normal. 

Kyle hoped that the rumor would die out on it’s own but two days later it was all anyone could talk about. His locker had gained a couple more bigoted comments but he used Windex to get rid of them. He began spending his homeroom period in the library to get work done using the quiet. During the past two days most of the class would be whispering about him. He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned, it was an underclassmen, a tenth grader.

“What”he asked confused and slightly disgusted. “Uh you slept with a guy right”he asked tapping his fingers together nervously “No”Kyle said roughly turning around “B-But that’s what I heard”the kid said surprised. “Who cares? It was a dumb rumor”Kyle turned back and the kid looked like he was about to cry Kyle instantly softened. 

“Oh I- I just thought there was another kid in school who was- gay”he whispered and Kyle swallowed. 

“There is. I mean I am. There’s plenty”he shook his head “How do you deal with this. I don’t know how to come out but you did it so awesomely”he beamed excitement. “Uh I didn’t plan it like this”Kyle mumbled “But it happened and you did it with that guy”the kid nodded happily. “No I didn’t”Kyle said sternly the kid looked confused “Um are you sure”he asked slowly Kyle was taken aback by the stupidity. “Yes”he shouted receiving a shush in return. 

“Oh- um cause I was gonna ask you if you could do it with me”the kid looked down and twiddled his fingers “Ew no. Get out of here”Kyle turned away once more now angry at the kid. “B-But I just want to come out and be cool like you”Kyle froze “All my friends think you’re so cool and I want to be like you and if- if I do it was a senior. I’ll be the coolest tenth grader ever”the kid had so much excitement for something that never even happened and Kyle had a soft spot for young gay kids. 

“Look”Kyle said turning for the third time “I’m not gonna do it with you”he said flatly the kid nodded slowly and sadly. Kyle sucked in breath he was already in the hole, he might as well help someone while he’s down there. “But I will let you tell people we did it”he said rolling his eyes the kid perked up instantly “Really”he asked. Kyle nodded “Yes but only because I want you to feel more comfortable about coming out than I did”Kyle swallowed. “I will”the kid said excited “And you face the repercussions. You might get bullied, rude names, pushing, beatings. That’s you’re deal”Kyle pointed and the kid nodded excited once more “I already deal with that now I might as well be cool”. 

That made Kyle laugh but it rang very true to him. Kyle had never been considered cool before and on some small level having this kid look up to him for something so dirty made him feel cool. The rumor about Kyle sleeping with another guy, this time a tenth grader, spread faster than the first one, if even possible. Kyle was shocked when he received a text from Stan after school asking him if he heard and if it was true. The next morning when he walked into school he felt the same amount of eyes on him but this time it felt good. It was his choice this time, his rumor, and he liked the attention. 

“Man you are on fire”Kenny laughed Kyle smirked but rolled his eyes “So did you?”Stan asked Kyle shook his head. 

“No, seriously what do you take me for”he went to pull stuff out of his locker. There was only one rude word written on his locker this morning and he started to think that this rumor would actual help his coming out. 

“Well dude I don’t know who this tenth grader is but they have some balls to make this up”Stan said. Kyle opened his locker while chuckling a small envelope fell out and he carefully picked it up for the floor. Only the words thank you were written on it but inside a 50 dollar gift card sat Kyle looked disturbed. He had seen this set of event somewhere before but he couldn’t think of it at the moment. 

“Listen, don’t tell anyone but I told that kid that he could spread the rumor”Kyle said shutting his locker. Kenny started laughing while Stan looked confused “Why”Stan asked. Kyle shrugged “He really needed it”. Halfway through the day Kyle remembered what all these rumors reminded him of: The movie Easy A. Kyle chuckled to himself he wouldn’t let things get that out of control and his life wasn’t some movie. Little did the redhead know that rumors were slippery slopes and he had become, unbeknownst to him, the beacon for all struggling gay kids. 

“Hey pst”someone whispered from the opposite side of the bookshelf Kyle was looking through. “I heard what you did for that tenth grader”a book suddenly jumped off the shelf and a person’s face peeped through. This time it was someone in Kyle’s class “You’re all anyone’s been talking about so I wanna sleep with you”he had a crazy "desperate for popularity” look in his eye. 

“What? Gross. Go away”Kyle picked the discarded book up off the floor “I don’t want to actually sleep with you. I want to fake it”he wiggled his eyebrows. “I’m not doing this”Kyle said slamming the book back in it’s spot. “Why not? You did it for that kid. Why am I any different”the guy asked quickly, he rounded the corner and cut Kyle off. 

“I don’t have to talk to you. Now move”the smaller teen went to go around the guy “I’m just gonna tell everyone anyway”the guy said making Kyle pause. This was turning out more and more like the sappy comedy movie as Kyle went on with the lie. But he found himself too deep and he’s always been a firm believer in sticking to a plan, however horrible it was. “Fine motherfucker”he jabbed a finger into the guy’s chest “I want a 100 dollar gift card in my locker by tomorrow’s lunch and you tell everyone I was the best you’ve ever had”if this rumor was going to fuck with Kyle’s life he was going to be the ring leader. 

When Kyle got home he read the entire book Scarlet Letter, he watched both the Scarlet Letter movies, and Easy A. He studied all the materials and planned his path, if he was lucky and smart he would have enough money to pay for all his senior activities as well as popularity to rule the school. But Kyle wasn’t going to let this rumor ruin his life like Olive in Easy A. Kyle walked into the school the next day as if he owned the place he knew everyone’s eyes were on him and he basked in it. When he saw his locker a new unwanted word was scribbled in the center. 

He smirked and pulled open his locker then he simply crossed the word out with a big ‘X’ then his eyes spotted something tucked away deep in his locker almost never used. Kyle pulled out his white board meant for studying and with full conviction the teen stuck it to the front of his locker. Now he was in control of everything and he was gonna play it out right. Kyle gained two new business partners over the week he requested actual money from them which they obliged to but the rumor that he was accepting money for sex spread around quickly. Although that was all according to his plan. He sat in homeroom flipping through a book he wasn’t reading he periodically glanced up seeing the same two guys staring at him. Finally he looked up and gave them a sexy smirk they faltered and turned away both blushing. 

Kyle chuckled lightly but Stan hit him on the shoulder “Dude we have to talk outside”he whispered. Kyle walked by the two guys more slowly as he left the classroom. “Oh Kenny good. Come here”Stan yelled spotting Kenny outside his homeroom. 

“Man if I get caught over here I’m gonna get detention so make it quick”he whined, for a tall fairly strong guy Kenny was a push over sometimes. 

“Kyle you’ve gotta stop this rumor shit. It’s getting out of hand”Stan said making Kyle laugh “What no way. I’ve got this under control”he brushed some dust off his shoulder smugly.

“I don’t know I heard you got caught with a teacher in the janitors closet”Kenny said rubbing the back of his neck Kyle made a disgusted face. 

“Oh people suck”he shook it off “Whatever, I’m making bank and I’m finally popular”. His two friends made a series of scoffs and high pitched noises dismissing his claim of unpopularity. “Cut it out. You two have it so easy being ten feet tall but I”he motioned to himself “Am super short and this is the only way I can actually be someone”his hands dropped to his side. 

“Do you really want to be a whore”Stan said and Kyle gasped “I am not a whore”Kenny quickly averted his eyes. “D-Do you guys think I’m a whore”Kyle asked scared the two stayed quiet “Kenny!”Kyle shouted forcing the other to lock eyes with him “Do you think I’m a whore”he asked again. Kenny sighed “I mean not really. Since you haven’t actually been with anyone”he tilted his head back forth while he thought. 

“I’m not so sure”Stan mumbled and Kyle looked over shocked “What did you say”. Stan gritted his teeth and looked over to Kyle “All I’m saying is that you don’t really remember the night at the party and now you're acting completely different. For all I know this new Kyle is a whore”. There was something in Stan’s voice that Kyle couldn’t truly detect, it seemed to be jealousy, but at the moment Kyle didn't care. Kyle’s eyes went wide then angry “Fuck you Stan. I told you that asshole Jeff was lying and I would have known”when Stan didn’t take anything back and kept his stern face Kyle scoffed. 

“Some friend”he turned away and glanced at Kenny “What do you think”he asked Kenny swallowed. The tall blonde looked between his two best friends “I uh I’m not sure”he said slowly Kyle turned fully to him with angry eyes. “If you guys don’t believe me then you don’t have to be a part of it”Kyle crossed his arms and turned away to hide how truly hurt he was “Listen Kyle we’re not trying to fight you we’re just”Stan started but Kyle cut him off. “You’re just calling me a whore and not believing me. Yeah honestly- some friends. Get out of here. You don’t wanna be seen with a whore”. 

Kyle rushed up to his room that afternoon and screamed into his pillow then punched his mattress. “I’ve only been with like four guys and suddenly I’m a whore”Kyle muttered through clenched teeth. “They all want me to be some huge whore”he laughed bitterly then looked over to the movie Easy A now sitting on his desk in its box. “They want a whore, they’re gonna get a whore”he said walking over to his closet without knowing it he descended even deeper into the lie. With tight black pants red boots and a crop top Kyle strutted into the school hall. Jaws dropped, people stopped whispering and just spoke, Kyle became the school whore. His business took off after that he had seen way more people than he assumed he would and even some repeats but he never took anyone more than twice. 

“IHop, who the fuck eats there”he looked up to the guy who was paying him “I just thought- since you already have everywhere else”the guy said scared. “What the fuck are you saying”Kyle asked eyeing the guy “Nothing nothing”. Kyle looked down to the card “Whatever get the fuck out of here”he motioned with his head. He looked down at the gift card and shook his head after shoving the gift card in his pocket he headed towards his English class. “Hey Kyle”Bebe stopped the redhead “You’re like really popular now so you’re invited to my party tonight”she chewed and popped some gum. 

She was known around school as an easy girl to get in bed but it was easy to surpass her with a few simple lies. Kyle wasn’t sure about a party considering the last time but he was already too far gone maybe at this party he’ll become a drug dealer or something equally stupid. “I’m going to a party later”Kyle told his parents while grabbing an apple off the counter “Oh another party”his mom said smiling. 

“Son uh we’ve been meaning to ask you about the way you’re dressing”his father said obviously uncomfortable. “Oh this. It’s nothing just some fad that’s going around”Kyle waved it off and started up towards his room “Sorry I won’t be at dinner. Love you”he yelled his parents smiled and went back to making dinner. 

Even though Kyle was popular he had become so popular that nobody bothered talking to him. Guys were to afraid to approach him fearing that if they even talked to him they’d suddenly turn gay and girls didn’t like that he was popular for something that they essentially cornered the market on. Kyle sighed and absentmindedly wished for the times before this huge rumor got out of control. 

“Hey enjoying the party”a guy leaned on the wall next to him and Kyle gave a fake smile that quickly dropped. “Yeah I don’t know this Bebe girl but her party sucks”he looked around, the party was going just as well as the last one Kyle had been to. 

“Well she tried. Points for that I guess”Kyle said shrugging the guy smirked “You’re funny”. Kyle looked around once more and that’s when Kyle saw him. Stan stood across the room talking with some people but frequently he would glance over to Kyle. 

“I’ve heard some stuff about you actually”the guy next to Kyle said scratching his arm. 

“Well all good things I hope”Kyle put on a sexier voice the guy laughed “Great things”. 

They stood quietly for a few seconds “You know, I think there’s an empty room over there. It’ll be quieter to talk in”he pointed down the hall and Kyle looked over to Stan who, by now, had completely disregarded his conversation and was directing his full attention to Kyle. “Sounds great”Kyle said narrowing his eyes at his supposed best friend. Stan watched Kyle walk away into the hall with the random guy. 

Once the door shut a hand landed on Kyle’s waist “Uh hold on”Kyle said pulling away “I don’t know what you heard but it’s probably not true”. The kid had black hair styled similarly to Stan’s as well as Stan’s height and Kyle would be lying if he didn’t find the guy attractive. “You don’t have to be shy. From what I’ve heard you’re pretty freaky”he stepped towards the redhead placing his hand once more on Kyle’s waist. 

“I don’t even know you and all that stuff you heard is a lie. I never slept with anyone”Kyle put on a stern face the guy chuckled “My name is Dan”his other arm slowly wrapped itself around Kyle as he ignored what Kyle had confessed. 

“Well Dan”Kyle mocked the name “What makes you think I wanna be with you”their bodies pressed against one another tightly. 

“If you didn’t, I think you would have punched me by now”that made Kyle chuckle lightly. Kyle didn’t want to admit it but this guy reminded him of Stan. He hated Stan right now, they were fighting, but that didn’t make Kyle’s crush go away. Dan quickly leaned down and caught Kyle’s lips they kissed for a few seconds until Kyle pulled away everything felt wrong. 

“I can’t”Kyle said “What’s wrong”he didn’t wait for an answer instead he attacked Kyle’s neck. Kyle pushed against the other body “I don’t want this. Let me go”there wasn’t a budge. “You’ll like it”Dan whispered lying soft kisses on Kyle’s ear. “No I don’t. Stop, I’m telling you to stop”Kyle demanded Dan pulled away only slightly with a sigh “Fine, I’ll pay you if that’s the problem”. Kyle’s eyes went wide “I can’t believe I thought you were cute. Let me go now”he slammed a hand on the chest against his own. “Just calm down. Everything will be fine”Dan leaned down once more continuing his hickey “Stop”Kyle yelled.

The doorknob twisted but it was locked Kyle swallowed “Stop it”his voice was weak. With a loud crash the door burst open a black shoe mark now centered on the white wood. “Get your fucking hands off him”Stan shouted Kyle felt relief come over him as Dan’s arms shot up. “You’re lucky I don’t kick your ass”Stan said with a sneer they seemed equally matched but Dan scoffed “Whatever. Whore”he shot a dirty glare towards Kyle. Stan grabbed Kyle’s arm roughly and started pulling him through the house. Once outside Kyle could breath he hadn’t noticed the air in the house being that thick but when fresh air entered his body he gasped for it. 

Stan walked quickly dragging Kyle by the wrist as they crossed the street. Kyle huffed to keep up and not have his arm pulled out of socket. Stan only let his arm go when they got to the car Kyle rubbed his wrist as it was slightly bruised from being grabbed so roughly then pulled. He got in the passenger’s seat and swallowed while Stan turned the car on. Kyle pushed a strap of his tank top up back onto his shoulder he wasn’t sure if he should thank Stan. He was still extremely mad at Stan but he was starting to see Stan’s side of the argument. 

With everything that has happened, even Kyle questioned his own view on the first party's accident. He was sure that everything had been lies, he was sure— wasn’t he? If he was so sure then why did he feel like he was a whore? Stan stopped at Kyle’s house and Kyle got out slowly he took in a breath then closed his mouth with a small discouraged sound. The car door closed echoing off the houses on the empty street. He entered his house staring at the floor everyone was asleep. Kyle’s legs shook and he pressed two hands to his face then slid down the door a small sob finding it’s way out of his miserable body. 

This time when Kyle walked down the halls of South Park High he didn’t like the attention. All he wanted was for his life to go back to normal, he wanted to stop showing his midriff and legs. He wanted to focus on his academics again but most of all he wanted his best friend back. When he got to his locker someone had taken the liberty of writing a single word on his white board. The word took up the entire board and it’s size was the reason there was only one word. In bold blocky letters ‘Whore’ was written out, the word couldn’t hurt Kyle physically but emotionally it cut down deep into his soul.

In a fit of rage Kyle yanked the piece of white plastic off the locker and whipped it across the hall. It hit the lockers behind Kyle with a loud crash scaring off the students around Kyle, they rushed away quickly. Kyle turned away from the discarded white board back to his locker. The pea green locker sported the old poorly crossed out bigoted term ‘Fag’. Kyle’s jaw shook, in all this mess he had forgotten why he was doing all this. Tears collected in Kyle’s eyes and he pressed a hand to the term then in another burst of uncontrollable rage he punched the locker. 

Kyle kept his head down during class he felt that if he answered any questions it would draw even more attention to himself. “Kyle”the teacher called out his head shot up fearing he would have to answer a question he wasn’t aware of. She held up a purple piece of paper, it was an office summoning he swallowed. As he got up he pulled his shoulder bag on and grabbed his books people watched him walk between the desks. He could feel each pair of eyes digging deep into his confidence. Every person took a chunk of his soul and confidence. The paper summoned him to the school counselor, she was a nice lady that Kyle had only heard stories about from Kenny. Kenny had probably visited the counselor more times than anyone else in the school. Kyle prayed to every figure of ultimate power for this to not end with him being rumored to have chlamydia like Olive in Easy A. 

“Kyle, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Mrs. Scout”she stood and gave a sweet smile. He shook her hand then sat down across from her desk “I was surprised to hear about some of the rumors going around about you”she picked up a notepad and shook her head. Kyle’s eyes slowly traveled down “I’ve heard a lot about you from your friend, Kenny”she set the notepad down “He explained someone so caring, so smart, so funny. But these rumors”she picked the notepad up and tossed it over to the other side of the desk. The hurtful lies people were spreading were now written out and staring Kyle in the face. 

According to that yellow sheet he had slept with more than half of their class, been caught in the bathrooms three times, fucked two people from outside the school, and even one teacher of the senior class. “I won’t say that I’m not shocked. It’s perfectly fine to explore but this”she let out a sigh. 

“You’re not gonna give me condoms are you”Kyle said scared she made a face “I don’t have those on hand. But they’re important, sexually transmitted diseases are real and they will destroy your life”she pointed at Kyle who nodded. “Mrs. Scout”Kyle said looking up he bit his bottom lip “You don’t think I’m a whore right”his voice shook and tears threatened to fall. She pursed her lips “No, oh no. Never Kyle. I think you’re just lost right now”she got up from her chair. 

She laid a comforting arm around Kyle’s shoulder “You’ll find your way but you’ll need help”she leaned down slightly “Kenny told me you haven’t been talking to him or your other friend”. Kyle nodded weakly “At this time the best thing for you to do is have friends. Kenny really wants you to talk to him again and I have a feeling you really want to make up with them as well”. Kyle let out a short sob “More than anything”she nodded “Ok then, make a plan and go with that plan. Everything will work out”. 

When Kyle left her office he was determined he was going to apologize to his best friends and he was going to fix this whole situation, all he had to do was make it to lunch. When Kyle entered his classroom he froze two police officer stood at the front of the class. 

“Are you Kyle Broflovski”one of the officers stepped closer to him. “Y-Yes”he said nervously “We just need to ask a few questions. Would you come with us?”. He nodded slowly the class was dead silent and the teacher watched in utter shock as her best student was escorted out by police. They escorted the small teen to the principal’s office, Kenny sat outside and he looked up quickly obviously startled. 

“Kyle”he stood the officer held out a hand “Please stay seated”he ordered Kenny slowly sat back down. The door opened and Stan stepped out he and Kyle locked eyes. Stan looked worried but his eyes dropped and he looked over to Kenny. “Go in”the second officer pointed to the office it was unusually dark in the room with the shades drawn. “Sit”the first officer commanded a single chair was pressed against the wall and Kyle sat down. 

“We’ve had some intel claiming that you and a teacher here had sexual intercourse”one of the officers leaned back against the principal’s desk who was nowhere in sight. “It’s not true!”Kyle said quickly “It’s all a bunch of lies”his voice shook. “We don’t want to accuse you of anything but this is a very serious crime. Did any of the teachers ever approach you inappropriately”the second one asked. Kyle shook his head “Never. This is all a mistake”Kyle tried not to cry but it was all too much, this had officially gone too far. 

“I never had sex with anyone, I never came onto a teacher or the other way around. I’ve never even been to second base with anyone I just want this all to stop”he ran a hand through his hair and let out a sob. “Are you telling the truth? Is this all just some high school rumor”one of the officers stepped forward “Yes, yes it is!”Kyle shouted. They looked to each other “You do dress rather provocatively”the first one looked over Kyle cried “I’ve been so stupid. Please I don’t want to go to jail. I don’t want anyone to go to jail. All of this is one big lie”he wiped away tears messily. 

“Calm down son. No one is going to jail, we believe you”the second one grabbed a tissue box and handed it over to Kyle. “Oh thank god”Kyle said hiccuping the two looked to one another “Our other witnesses had the same story. Just a rumor gone wrong. You’re free to go. Sorry for giving you such a scare”they opened the door and Kyle stood. He took the box of tissues with him as he left “Kyle”Stan said shocked when the other existed the room. 

“Stan I’m sorry. I’m so sorry”Kyle jumped onto Stan wrapping his arms around the taller teen’s neck. “Kyle I’m the one who’s sorry. I said some shitty things, I didn’t mean them”the two hugged for a few seconds before another pair of arms joined them. “Guys I’m sorry too”Kenny said leaning into the hug. Kyle chuckled, he really missed his friends, “Ken you didn’t do anything”Stan said slightly pushing him away. “Yeah well I’m still sorry I exist”Kenny shrugged and the three laughed. 

“What do I do now guys”Kyle said as they pulled apart “The whole school thinks I’m a slut and that I slept with a teacher”he made a disgusted noise. Kenny shrugged “Just get into a relationship. That’s how all the sluts fizzle out”he had a real point and Kyle nodded slowly. “But”Kyle sighed “Nobody would want to be with me”he looked off to the side “I would”Stan said in a casual tone Kyle looked over quickly. The three were quiet until Kenny’s mouth pop broke the silence “Well I’m gonna let you guys talk”Kenny pointed off in a random direction then wandered away. 

“Stan you don’t really mean that”Kyle said shaking his head Stan shrugged. “Why not”he asked Kyle laughed his tone instantly going nervous “Well first off you’d be putting yourself into the rumor and trust me. You don’t want that trouble”Stan quickly butt in. “What if I want the trouble”he smirked Kyle let out an airy laugh “Secondly”he said loudly his mind racing “Everyone would think you were gay. You won’t get any girls after we clear my name”Kyle cut a hand through the air to signify the slashing of Stan’s love life. 

“Kyle I don’t think you really get it”Stan said Kyle let out a few breathy laughed then scoffed. “Get what? There’s nothing to get”he was denying everything his brain told him but Stan set his hands on Kyle’s shoulders and gave a read the mood look. 

“Oh lord. Would you two just kiss already”Kenny yelled through the hall he was poorly hidden behind the corner near them. Kyle’s face went red “Shut up Kenny it’s not like that”he looked back to Stan “Right?”Stan chuckled. “It’s been like that for a while now”he admitted Kyle’s face got even hotter “Well then- what are you waiting for. Kiss me”he grabbed Stan’s arms and leaned up Stan lower himself and they finally kissed. It was everything Kyle had thought it would be and more but he wouldn’t have imagined this story to have this happy an ending.


End file.
